Alice Lahoda

“The teacher said in front of the class that it wasn’t his fault that I had ‘a tramp for a mother.’ I was 12 years old.”

Mid-sneeze, making weird faces, eyes glowing in the dark — essentially anything that makes you laugh out loud and go “WTF.”

“The cost of car insurance when they start driving. Your insurance payments will triple — and then there’s the cost of the ‘minor’ accidents they get into. 🙄”

“How can you hold on to the right things, if you can’t let go of the wrong things...” —@tkelce (classic Libra♎)

I shouldn’t have to say this, but bathroom doors shouldn’t be see-through. 🚽👀

“Overheard my kids whispering outside my bedroom door and one of them said ‘she hasn’t had coffee yet’ and then they both backed away from my door and it was quiet again.” —@kristabellerina

“Told my sister I had to buy rice krispy treats cause I’m snack mom for my daughter’s game and she said why don’t you just make them and I said I’m sorry you have the wrong number and hung up on her.” —@itssherifield

“Told my sister I had to buy rice krispy treats cause I’m snack mom for my daughter’s game and she said why don’t you just make them and I said I’m sorry you have the wrong number and hung up on her.” —@itssherifield

“I don’t know why I have a headache. all I do is look at screens much of the day then go out in the sun for hours then grind my teeth all night” —@danielleweisber

“My daughter wrote a story titled ‘My Mom Loves Coke’ but didn’t clarify it was the soda and now I’m nervous for parent-teacher conferences” —@KatieDeal99

“My daughter wrote a story titled ‘My Mom Loves Coke’ but didn’t clarify it was the soda and now I’m nervous for parent-teacher conferences” —@KatieDeal99

“Now that my kid is in high school, I’m trying to be his silent sideline support system, but last night he told me his English teacher is making him put two spaces after a period, and HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO NOT INTERVENE?!?” —@SaraMooreWagne1

“Now that my kid is in high school, I’m trying to be his silent sideline support system, but last night he told me his English teacher is making him put two spaces after a period, and HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO NOT INTERVENE?!?” —@SaraMooreWagne1

“Ordered new coats for my kids and for convenience I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section.” —@Chhapiness

“Ordered new coats for my kids and for convenience I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section.” —@Chhapiness

“Heard a woman in Target ask her kid ‘is that a smart choice to make with your money?’ and now I wish she would follow me around the store, too.” —@oneawkwardmom

“Do you get jealous when your Lyft driver has a new ride added to their queue when you’re still in their car, or are you normal?” —@meg_it_happen

“Lol my daughter told me lately at school recess she’s been gardening and I was like what and she said ‘I asked the recess teacher if I could just have a bit of earth’” —@ambernoelle

“i love when bands are like ‘we haven’t played our most popular three songs but we’re leaving the stage now…..don’t ask us to come back out….we won’t do it…..don’t even think about chanting…..’” —@_chase_____

“I found out my girlfriend was using fake social media accounts to bully and harass other women — including my ex wife. Instantly dumped.”